My own focus was to explore two areas seldom discussed within the Age Sector: Older Sex Workers and the Pornography Industry and Porn use and engagement by older adults.
The event was chaired and facilitated by Tammy WhyNot (a very unique experience). Each speaker was given 8minutes to present to which surprisingly I was compliant. What follows, therefore, is the pre-prepared full text, most of which went unsaid given the time constraint, but hopefully, you may find of interest.
THE CONTEXT AND THE "MISSING VOICES"
We are increasingly beginning to explore, understand and respond to the issues of ageing and wellbeing in the context of sexuality, sex and intimacy. Most of us would probably agree that sex has been a neglected issue in much gerontologic research. There are of course some notable exceptions. What research, however, has been undertaken is inclined to focus on sexual activity and sexual health, but what is encouraging, but not surprising, given the age demographic, is the role and meaning of sex in new intimate late-in-life relationships.Sex, however, is frequently framed in terms of the ideology of LOVE whereby causal sexual adventures are frowned upon and views about the sexual behaviour of young adults/adolescents perceived as being less healthy than that of older adults.
What is frequently absent is research incorporating the voices and views of older adults themselves. Asking older adults their views, opinions, experiences and attitudes with regard to their sexuality and activity. It is important here in the context of tonight, to respect a wish not to engage, not to be ambushed and Dawne, in her presentation rightly emphasised the absolute necessity of permissions, contexts, cultures and belief systems. The ethics of researchers ensure the protection of these obligations, but too frequently outside that construct, people can be coerced into "a confession based" interaction.
Those older voices that have been sought however seems to show:
- Older women describe male sexuality as simple and pleasure orientated - but men tended to actually subscribe to the same ideology of LOVE as the female adult.
- Sexual interest and activity is rekindled in new relationships and frequently seen as sexually better than previous relationships
- The importance of sexual self-realization (especially older adult women)
- Marriage was not seen as important for having a sexually intimate relationship
- Sex, however, was not entirely liberalized, but framed in an ideology of love.
AREAS SELDOM EXPLORED
1. PROSTITUTION AND OLDER SEX WORKERS: A Co-operative approach
Susan Davis is the Leader of the West Coast Co-operative of Sex Industry Professionals (Canada) and thought of forming a sex worker co-operative following her meeting with members of India's thriving. It started back in 1995 and now has 65,000 members. Its purpose was to " promote their quality of life at a number of levels and is good for the morale of everybody and particularly to minimize the potential risks in sex work".
Davis has been an escort for 25 years and evidence that being a Co-operative provides:
- Control of working conditions and safety
- Profits that benefits the workers
- Scholarships for sex workers
- Loans
- Employment opportunities for those wishing to exit sex work.
The legal framework and criminalization related to "living off immoral earnings" present serious barriers within Canada and of course the United Kingdom in establishing Co-operative development. That said we need to acknowledge that the scale and engagement of older adults working within the sex industry generally are, as far as I know, unknown. In addition, when I asked my contacts within the Co-operative Sector some while ago, I was informed that there were no sex industry co-operatives or Collectives. Should there be? Absolutely, but would need to confront and dismiss what is illegal but not fall over some arcane outdated moral judgement and attitude to that which is lawful. The issue of lawful pornography and older workers within this industry and/or those older adults viewing it is my next discussion point
2. "DIRTY OLD MEN AND WOMEN AND THEY": PORNOGRAPHY
Pornography is generally defined as "visual depictions that are intended to sexually arouse the viewer" ( Tarrant S The Pornography Industry 2016). Regardless of the medium, the challenge in defining the term, as Tarrant points out is that one person's pornography may seem like hate speech to the next. What is the difference between erotica and porn? Some argue that pornography "reflects patriarchal hegemony or abusing the other, while erotica depicts sex among equals and thus free of subjugation." In short, pornography is about dominance: erotica mutuality.If we reflect on the negative attitudes and stereotypes towards and about older adults and ageing, no wonder there has been so little exploration of this area of engagement and behaviour. Past and existing attitudes towards older women they are multiply dammed, men simply get away with simply being regarded as "a dirty old man". The mere use of the word pornography evokes negative reactions, let alone to those older adults actively engaged and participating in the industry. Tarrant says " the ubiquitous presence of pornography is a rich source for studying the ways in which ideas about gender, race, class, beauty, and sex are constructed, conveyed and maintained." She adds " Pornography is an important media category for questioning normative expectations exploring forms of resistance that challenge racism, classism and ageism" (italics mine)
Is pornography a crime, a sin, a vice or a choice? "It cuts to the heart of sexual pleasure, sexual danger, censorship, coercion and personal agency" (Tarrant again)
Let me ask a question. How far is pornography discussed and a source of sex education within the sex and wellbeing literature, guidance and pr retirement workshops by employers? How far is it a subject of discussion in day centres, residential care, Older adult Forums between sing songs, bingo and Any Other Business?
Dawne Garrett and my dear friend Shirley Ayres ( sitting in the audience) have for some time been discussing a publication ( Journal article?) on a whole range of sex and sexuality in later life. Being a recent convert to social media ( in part Shirley's fault) I checked out Twitter accounts related to sex, sexuality, pornography and dating sites for the over 50's. I'm not particular;y an innocent, but I was surprised by the breadth and scope- all tastes catered for, but that said, I was convinced that the engagement of older adults regardless of genders, sexual orientation and preferences actively engaged as performers in the pornographic industry and/or engaged in viewing was an issue worth exploring in the context of public health, mental health, wellbeing, relationships, addiction. The free and easy availability of porn via social media is rightly well researched with regard to child protection, but it is necessary to explore its impact on older adults, not necessarily in the context of safeguarding ( though that said, it does raise some interesting issues in that regard re MCA) but in addressing sex and ageism, sex and wellbeing, sex that is free from moral judgement, sex and social media, sex and so-called sex toys, sex and health, sex that is, for the over 70's a joy!
Finally, as I was reminded recently, the rejection of sexual activity, however, defined is and remains in the control of each and every one of us.
[Sources: I have avoided lengthy footnotes or references, but are available on request.DM me @Merv.ChangeAGEnt]
